Do You Give Your Power Away?

Open your heart to goodness.


Louise L. Hay The act of forgiveness takes place in our own mind. It really has nothing to do with the other person.

WHEN WE BLAME another, we give our power away because we’re placing the responsibility for our feelings on someone else. People in our lives may behave in ways that trigger uncomfortable responses in us. However, they didn’t get into our minds and create the buttons that have been pushed. Taking responsibility for our own feelings and reactions is mastering our “ability to respond.” In other words, we learn to consciously choose rather than simply react.

We can’t talk about resentment without also talking about forgiveness. Forgiving someone doesn’t mean that we condone their behavior. The act of forgiveness takes place in our own mind. It really has nothing to do with the other person. The reality of true forgiveness lies in setting ourselves free from holding on to the pain. It’s simply an act of releasing ourselves from the negative energy.

Forgiveness does not mean allowing the painful behaviors or actions of another to continue in your life. Sometimes, forgiveness means letting go. You forgive them and release them. Taking a stand and setting healthy boundaries are often the most loving things you can do—not only for yourself, but for the other person as well.

I truly believe that there are no mistakes. When our hearts are closed and we feel resentment and anger and sadness, it’s hard to see anything good. Yet when our hearts are open, it’s as if so much of that negativity disappears and we’re able to release these old thoughts and reawaken to joy. For each of us, there’s always joy inside. And we need to know how very perfect we are as we are.

No matter how much chaos may be going on around us, no matter how many things may be going wrong or not the way we want them to, no matter what our bodies may be doing at the moment—we can love and accept ourselves. For the truth of us—the very truth of our being—is that we’re eternal. We have always been and we always will be. And that part of ourselves goes on forever. Rejoice that this is so. As we love and accept ourselves exactly as we are, it makes it easier to go through the so-called difficult times. We’re no longer fighting ourselves. We’re accepting. We’re becoming tender. We’re cherishing ourselves. We’re comforting ourselves and making it easier for ourselves.

See yourself standing in front of a mirror looking into your own eyes and saying, I love and accept you exactly as you are. And breathe. Just let yourself feel what you’re feeling. You don’t have to be perfect. You’re already perfect as you are: You are you. You’re exactly what you’ve chosen to be in this lifetime. Of all the bodies and all the personalities that were available, you chose to be who you are—to experience this world, this lifetime, through your body, through your personality. So love your choice, for it is part of your spiritual evolution.

Brave New World

Write a magazine feature for older readers called ‘Brave New World’. The feature should try to persuade the reader that current and future technology is not simply aimed at young people but that it can benefit older people too. The article should be written in a lively and interesting way.

Writer: Umme Salma Gadriwala

The advent of the 21st century brought with itself a storm of new gadgets that befuddle you. You find yourself surrounded by new gizmos that fail to make sense. Gone are the good old days when telephone was a luxury and listening to the radio was a treat after a long, tiring day.

Mr. Adnan, sixty-five year old retired accountant, says, “Just three decades ago, the computer in my neighborhood was a funny looking box with a black and white television screen. Back then, it only did the math for you; but it was so difficult to use that I would rather do it myself.”

You remember, penning down verses of love for your special one, posting them and waiting days for replies. Though the wait was tiresome, you liked it that way.

However, your descendants disagreed.

They found the landline too settled; they wanted it to be portable. The television is now flooded with channels you had not heard of before.

Living in a metropolis, seventy-two year old Mrs. Pervez, recalls, “In my college days, there was only one channel – PTV, and it aired dramas once a week. Oh! What amazing plots they had.”

The letters are replaced with emails and SMS, where messages are delivered within minutes and seconds.

In the train you see young teenagers glaring at their mobile phones, with loud music blasting in their ears and mindlessly tapping their feet, oblivious to the world around them. At home, your three-year-old grandchild talks about Angry Birds at the dinner table, and your teenage grandson barely turns his head from the flashing screen when you talk to him.

“I’m Facebook-ing granddad!” he replies.

Mrs. Irfan, seventy-eight and a widow, says, “After my husband’s death, my daughter bought me a ‘smart’ phone, to keep in touch. I don’t know what was so smart about it. I couldn’t even make a call!”

While you feel alienated in this new world of modern devices, it is possible to befriend these aliens. A recent survey conducted by the University of Sheffield, UK, indicated that 85% of the older people who adapted to the changing times, found the gadgets highly engaging and useful.

Mr. Hussain, who is in his mid-sixties, says that it was his granddaughter who taught him how to use a mobile phone. “I have arthritis, and therefore could not help out much in the household chores. However, with my mobile phone, I can now order groceries, pay bills and stay in touch with my friends.”

These tools can help you improve the quality of your life and bridge the gap it has created between you and your children. At the dinner table, you can now join in the conversation about Angry Birds with your grandson.

Mr. Ali, a playful seventy year old, full of life, was introduced to Angry Birds by his seven-year-old enthusiastic neighbor. “I can’t sleep without having played a game or two of Angry Birds. It’s competitive, energetic and really gets my mind running.”

Thanks to these technologies, the world is now closer. Visiting your daughter in Australia (if you can get through the tedious visa procedures) is now only a matter of hours.  Not only has it become faster, but also easier and more comfortable.

Mrs. Khalid, grandmother of two, articulates, “My son has been working in Norway for over ten years now. Thanks to the ease of travel, I can now visit him and my grandchildren every year.”

In the second innings of your life, opening up your mind to this new world, will also open a host of new possibilities for you. The opportunities are limitless, for both, the young and the old. The brave new world is the vast ocean, waiting for you to step in and rediscover life once again.